No amount of text on Mommyhood can ever be complete without a note on PPD- Post Partum depression. Yes, it’s as real as real can get. I didn’t feel exceptionally elated during my pregnancy, so I wondered if my post partum had maybe begun pre partum ( believe you me sometimes I feel that destiny has singled me out for all exceptional experiences ). But lo behold, I wasnt even remotely prepared for PPD when it hit me. It started with the sleep wariness and fatigue, and gradually took over all aspect of my charming personality. There were moments when I would break down inconsolably not knowing why, and then moments when I would be raging with anger- again not knowing why. I can imagine what a blast I must have been to live with. Kudos to my husband for putting up with me.
Then again becoming parents takes a huge toll on a couple’s relationship. Like I mentioned above, for the mother post partum depression is real, which the world has today acknowledged and accepted. I wonder if there is a PPD equivalent for new fathers. It must be awfully painful to be going thru something of this nature and not being able to voice- because hey, the world has already accepted that the mother is going to be depressed, and that a new born baby is going to be handful. So really we have not allowed new fathers to even feel that depression, after all the house needs atleast one functional brain. So new fathers, unfortunately would need to Man up!!
The other big change of becoming a mother was also about adjusting with the help we could find. since we stay in a nuclear set up and because my mom in law passed away last year, we have had to find some alternative methods of getting help. After much cajoling, begging and emotional blackmailing of family, we decided that maybe it would be best to get paid help. So we were quick to read reviews on line and connect with some agencies. I had informal chats with quite a few ladies who were ‘jhapas’ specialising in post delivery care of mother and in handling new born. What we were absolutely not prepared for was the baggage that comes with outside help. Many a time’s we felt like we were walking on egg shells around them. God forbid we erred, we would be left without the precious help for days together.
Becoming a mother is a great balancing act, you feel like you are walking on a tight rope everyday. Every mother, each set of parents have to decide for themselves what works best for them. Oh there have been days when I have super envied stay at home moms. And then there have been days when I have been hugely grateful for having the opportunity to use my skills professionally. Each one of us has to decided what works best for us and make our eternal peace with it. Having said that, me time, I figured, is priceless. Sometimes just watching an episode of Honeland left me feeling good and picked me up enough to hit mommy duties a fresh. Sometimes when we are challenged with everything, it’s the simple pleasures of life that really pleases the soul. A walk in the park, just lying in the sun, reading a book, doing my nails, or even wearing make up some days could leave me feeling elated. That’s the beauty of life I keep forgetting.
The other big change of becoming a mother was also about adjusting with the help we could find. since we stay in a nuclear set up and because my mom in law passed away last year, we have had to find some alternative methods of getting help. After much cajoling, begging and emotional blackmailing of family, we decided that maybe it would be best to get paid help. So we were quick to read reviews on line and connect with some agencies. I had informal chats with quite a few ladies who were ‘jhapas’ specialising in post delivery care of mother and in handling new born. What we were absolutely not prepared for was the baggage that comes with outside help. Many a time’s we felt like we were walking on egg shells around them. God forbid we erred, we would be left without the precious help for days together.
Becoming a mother is a great balancing act, you feel like you are walking on a tight rope everyday. Every mother, each set of parents have to decide for themselves what works best for them. Oh there have been days when I have super envied stay at home moms. And then there have been days when I have been hugely grateful for having the opportunity to use my skills professionally. Each one of us has to decided what works best for us and make our eternal peace with it. Having said that, me time, I figured, is priceless. Sometimes just watching an episode of Honeland left me feeling good and picked me up enough to hit mommy duties a fresh. Sometimes when we are challenged with everything, it’s the simple pleasures of life that really pleases the soul. A walk in the park, just lying in the sun, reading a book, doing my nails, or even wearing make up some days could leave me feeling elated. That’s the beauty of life I keep forgetting.
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